Want to Live to Be 150? These Medical Technologies Are Going to HelpBy Damien on November 18, 2013 - 6:40 am |
Remember the story about the guy who
was obsessed with immortality and spent his life trying to find the
fountain of youth? Of course he died, but it’s too bad he wasn’t
around to see the kind of technology we have now—and what we’re
going to have in the very near future.
Have you ever played any of the Deus Ex games? That's pretty much what we have in store for us in the not-so-distant future. Personally, I can't wait to live in a world where prosthetic limbs are superior to the fleshy ones we've been born with, and that's exactly what researchers working in the field of “neuroprosthetics” plan to create.
These prosthetics are so advanced that, instead of basically being a good looking peg-leg like we have now, they'll basically get hooked up to implants on the nerves of your body, allowing you to control them just like you would with a real hand that didn't get chopped off in a car and/or spaceship crash. Awesome.
Growing Organs Will Be as Common As Breast Implants; Marginally Less Useful
Right now the only way to get a new organ is to get on a very long waiting list and hope that someone who checked the “donor” box on their driver's license falls off of their roof. That or, you know, picking up a drifter and putting his kidneys on ice.
Since this system isn't exactly efficient, scientists have been actively researching and developing the concept of “organ printing” for a number of years now—and we're getting closer every day. Basically, the idea is to be able to take cells directly from your body, pop them in a petri dish, and grow whatever new organ you need. Since these are your cells, it eliminates all of the complications that come with a donated organ.
This gives me hope that someday I'll be able to grow a larger penis that girls won't laugh at.
If All Else Fails, Take a Nap. A Really, Really Long Nap
It's the plot of pretty much every science fiction movie: the crew goes into suspended animation (or “cold sleep”), one crew member wakes up to find the rest of the crew dead, and—DUN DUN DUN—nerdy hijinks ensue. In space. It was an evil computer AI or an alien or something.
Predicatable sci-fi plots aside, the concept of suspended animation is actually quite plausible, and plenty of reputable organizations are working on perfecting the technology necessary as we speak, including DARPA and the A&M Institute for Preclinical Studies (translation: these people aren't quacks with Star Trek box sets).
So, say you make to 80 or whatever, and you're scared you're going to die before the awesome tech comes around that you need in order to live forever and bang hot robot girls. Jump into suspended animation for a couple hundred years, and, assuming that WWIII doesn't happen while you're asleep, you'll almost certainly be able to do that.