11.18.08 From the Viking
Top 10 Signs Your Chick Was Too Drunk Last Night (page 1)
Written by Mitch Martin
Check out more of Mitch Martin's work at TastyBooze.com!
It's happened to every one of us males that likes to date the ladies. Sometimes it's the extra bottle of wine after dinner, sometimes it's sparked by a cosmo fueled ladies night and other times the tequila tastes so good once it hits her lips she can't help herself. Sooner or later your lady is going to step out on the town and she's going to end up blitzed. She might not want to always fess up to it the next morning but here are the top 10 signs that your chick had way too much to drink last night.
1. She can't find her shoes and her underwear is in her purse.
This generally means one of two things. She either just had the funniest night of her life or you need to be really worried. If both of the above apply you're probably screwed.
2. She actually initiated sex.
You would like to think this would happen without the influence of booze but it usually takes a little liquid courage.
3. She isn't your girlfriend anymore.
Every relationship has gone through at least one drunken fight that generally isn't remembered the next morning.
4. She's got a dick drawn on her face.
This makes it easy to figure out that your lady is the lightweight in the group.
5. She slept on the bathroom floor.
"My closest friend…linoleum…Linoleum…Supports my head, gives me something to believe" Sometimes that cool linoleum is just what she needs when she's fighting the spins and puking every 20 minutes.
6. Her Facebook status reads 'I kisssed a gril and i lkied it whut wuht!!!!!!'.
7. She keeps saying, "Goddamn my piss is yellow!"
Nothing turns piss yellow faster than a night of cosmos and vodka Red Bulls.
8. She peed in the corner of your bedroom.
9. She has a Taco Bell receipt but no recollection of Nachos Bell Grande.
It's the greatest food ever when she's pissed but there always morning after guilt after she finds the reciepts and napkins.
10. She wakes up with stolen property.
We've all swiped some stupid knick-knack and then woke up the next morning and wondered what the fuck we were thinking.
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