12.27.06 From the Viking
The Top 10 Moments of 2006, by a Homeless Guy In Times Square
We asked our friend, Jerry Tillsdale, the homeless guy who panhandles outside the Applebee’s in Times Square, to give us his top 10 moments from 2006. Oh, what a year it’s been!
#10) Finding that defective razor in the trash in March.
#9) They stopped hosing down the street for the whole summer.
#8) The police never caught me for stealing that taco.
#7) I got 50 bucks for waiting in line for some kid who wanted a PS3
#6) Only two of my teeth fell out.
#5) Global Warming…that shit is amazing for a homeless guy like myself. We tend not to like cold winters…since we have no homes, and all.
#4) Joey The Lunatic With A Saxophone died. Thank god. What a cunt.
#3) I “found” a fourth shopping cart. Foodtown will be none the wiser, hehe!
#2) Thanks to all these E Coli outbreaks, the Mayor put pressure on busting restaurants for health violations. That means MORE FOOD FOR ME!
#1) Britney Spears is photographed with no panties on. I may be homeless and have no access to the internet, let alone a computer, but that shit was BIG, SON!
Share this on Digg, Facebook, Stumbleupon, etc.
No comments yet - post yours below!
Want to write a comment?
