Raising The Bar: Manliest Girly Drinks

Kyoto Cocktail

Ingredients: 3 oz gin, 1 oz Midori melon liqueur, 1/2 oz dry vermouth, 1/4 tsp fresh lemon juice

Why it's girly:  By default, all drinks that have Midori in them should be classified as girly simply because any alcoholic beverage that's "neon electric green" negates nearly all manliness.

Why it's manly: Try to pronounce the name of this drink. {waiting for you} Okay, close enough. Now have a few drinks, then pronounce it. "kee-yo-yo...key-toe-mo-yo...key-hoe-cock-balls...k y jelly"

Amaretto Sour

Ingredients: 1 1/2 oz amaretto almond liqueur, 1 - 2 splashes sweet and sour mix

Why it's girly:  It is probably the most casual drink of all time. Since there's so little alcohol in the drink, it takes way too many to get fucked up.

Why it's manly: They are really easy to make, and since men don't like the word "effort" this is the ideal mixed drink.

White Russian

Ingredients: 2 oz vodka, 1 oz coffee liqueur, light cream

Why it's girly: It has the words "liqueur" and "light cream" in the ingredients. You're probably saying, "But that's what makes it tastes good." And to you I say, "But that's what makes you a girl."

Why it's manly: Because you can order this drink with little to no cream, and it instantly becomes manly. I mean I could just bring up the fact that The Dude from The Big Lebowski orders these religiously, but I won't.

Black Velvet

Ingredients: 5 oz chilled stout, 5 oz chilled Champagne

Why it's girly: Most women can't stand stout. So someone out there, probably a woman, thought of pouring some Champagne into their stout. BRILLIANT! If you're a girl.

Why it's manly: It still has beer in it. Not to mention, if you do the math on this mixed drink, we're talking about 10 oz! Excess = manliness.

Red Headed Slut

Ingredients: 1 oz peach schnapps, 1 oz Jagermeister herbal liqueur, cranberry juice

Why it's girly: It is a very tasty drink that goes down way too smooth. If by the end of the shot you're not gurgling, making the "I can't believe I drank that" face or straight up choking then you my friend are drinking something girly.

Why it's manly: First off, they are shots. Secondly, its probably the best tasting way to get drunk. And last I checked, getting drunk is the end game anyway. They also provide great liquid courage to aid you in your attempts at picking up women at a bar.

Appletini

Ingredients: 1 1/2 oz Smirnoff Green Apple Twist vodka, 1 oz DeKuyper Sour Apple Pucker schnapps

Why it's girly: It has a fruit in it's title, so its definitely "fruity." Plus, you could probably ask every single girl you know and they would all say they love the stuff.

Why it's manly: Yes, its a very very girly drink. But let me put it simply for you: J.D. from Scrubs drinks it. 'Nuff said.