Objects That Objectify Women: 5 Hilarious Products

Setting Them Straight At A Young Age

You can never reinforce this idea too young: the near-universally accepted concept that pretty girls don't actually have to be smart. Oh, sure, there are a handful of hot scientist chicks on the planet, but that's certainly the very, very rare exception to the rule. Why bother learning mathematics when you're just going to marry a lawyer for his money when you're in your mid-20s—hot girls are ready to settle down around that age, after having had sex with twenty or thirty dudes at the local community college, that is. Empowering!

 

Honest Clothing Tags

This refreshingly honest clothing tag is the invention of a manufacturer in the UK called Madhouse. We may have entered into an era where women won't do your laundry, let alone learn how to cook a meal for you after you get home from a long day of work to pay off HER credit card bills (the horror!), but folks who wear clothes from the Madhouse line dare to dream.

 

The Misogynistic Candy Bar

You know they made the proclaimation that Yorkie bars aren't for girls just so that stupid women would buy them. “What? I can't have it? How dare you! I'll buy one right now, you fascist swine!” Note the person's hand in the picture is clearly that of a woman.

 

Just as planned.

 

Pen(is) Holder

 

This pen holder actually makes noises too. She'll moan, call you dirty old man, and (somewhat disturbingly) call for help. If you have one of these and actively use it in an office that has women in it, you've obviously got balls of steel.

 

We're All Thinking It, The Shirt Just Said It

While you'd have to be a tool to actually wear this shirt, it makes a fine point. How many times have you seen a girl from behind and thought, “Damn, I'd hit that,” only to change your mind to “...with a baseball bat” after she turns around?

 


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