04.08.08 From the Viking
Comedy List: What Will Happen When We Find the 'God Particle'?
Written by DV Staff
For those who don't know, the so-called God Particle is a theoretical subatomic particle currently referred to as the Higgs boson after the man who first postulated on its existence, Peter Higgs. It has been called the 'God Particle' due to the hope that its discovery will ultimately unify physics under a single model and 'know the mind of God,' and is being sought in the Fermilab particle supercollider in Chicago.
- Black hole created, eaten by hungry Americans.
- Physics is solved, Stephen Hawking returns to his first love: professional wrestling.
- Unstoppable matter-antimatter annihilation chain reaction starts. High-larious!
- The Cubs harness its power, get really, really close to the World Series.
- God's mind known, but he mostly thinks about America's Funniest Home Videos.
YOUR TURN!
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Matty
04/08/2008 15:06
Domino's Pizza can create a sauce that doesn't give me explosive diarreah
joe
04/08/2008 15:06
they find a way to clone beer cheaply
Matty
04/08/2008 15:06
My avy's jubblies will now come standard.
joe
04/08/2008 15:07
everyone prospers due to cheap beer
joe
04/08/2008 15:07
no need for gas as we can all stay home drunk all the time
joe
04/08/2008 15:07
joe cries at matty's avy's jubblies.....he is frightened by their enormity.....
Matty
04/08/2008 15:08
Joe, there are many a clone out there.
schlitz
old mill
keystone
steel reserve
pabts blue
you see where I'm going, right?
schlitz
old mill
keystone
steel reserve
pabts blue
you see where I'm going, right?
Mark
04/08/2008 15:09
Michigan actually beats us
Mark
04/08/2008 15:09
Dick Rod finds a QB
Mark
04/08/2008 15:10
This lady's arm is actually muscle
Mark
04/08/2008 15:10
people stop calling my work line
Mark
04/08/2008 15:10
I win the WSOP
Mark
04/08/2008 15:10
Ron Paul becomes president
Mark
04/08/2008 15:11
Will Ferrell has the rent money for Pearl
Mark
04/08/2008 15:12
Matty goes to rehab
Mark
04/08/2008 15:12
people wake the fuck up on DV
joe
04/08/2008 15:14
those are beer matty...keyword there was beer not piss
#1 Killer
04/08/2008 15:16
Schlitz is not THAT bad. LOL
#1 Killer
04/08/2008 15:17
Nothing.
Matty
04/08/2008 15:22
Rehab is for quiters...duh!!!!
other than that....I guess the rest could be 99% truth.
Just for that Mark, I'm getting BENT tonight.
other than that....I guess the rest could be 99% truth.
Just for that Mark, I'm getting BENT tonight.
Mark
04/08/2008 15:23
Me too brother, I got myself some "Jack Rabbit" and its delicious. Poker and trees till I squint
Matty
04/08/2008 15:24
I'm all in sucka.....................................pay up MotherFucker!!!!
Mark
04/08/2008 15:26
Flop came down K-A-K tho
Matty
04/08/2008 15:27
and the river is...........
Mark
04/08/2008 15:28
UNO!
Matty
04/08/2008 15:30
How the fuck did I get stuck with a pair of "Blue 6's"? you cheatin motherfucker!!!!
***sound of beer bottle breaking on table
***sound of beer bottle breaking on table
#1 Killer
04/08/2008 15:32
LMAO.
Whale
04/08/2008 15:34
man we are going to have some wicked betting come football season arent we, (shame bets ftw) and get in line behind me for the WSOP Mark.
And schlitz IS that bad
keystone isnt AS bad but still bad
They will use the particle as a genie and everyone in the world gets 3 wishes...
Whale, Mark and joe are walking in the wood and stumble on a lamp, they rub it and out pops a genie. Since theres three of you, you each get one wish.
Joe wishes and *poof* great cheap beer for everyone solving world hunger, the energy crisis, and emo.
Mark thinks for a second, and says, " I hate michigan i want a wall 75 feet and impenetrable so nothing can get in all the way around Ohio, to protect them from those damn michigan people" *poof* its is done, and the wall appears.
Whale thinks for a second and says, " 75 feet? nothing in? nothing out? ... fill it with water..."
And schlitz IS that bad
keystone isnt AS bad but still bad
They will use the particle as a genie and everyone in the world gets 3 wishes...
Whale, Mark and joe are walking in the wood and stumble on a lamp, they rub it and out pops a genie. Since theres three of you, you each get one wish.
Joe wishes and *poof* great cheap beer for everyone solving world hunger, the energy crisis, and emo.
Mark thinks for a second, and says, " I hate michigan i want a wall 75 feet and impenetrable so nothing can get in all the way around Ohio, to protect them from those damn michigan people" *poof* its is done, and the wall appears.
Whale thinks for a second and says, " 75 feet? nothing in? nothing out? ... fill it with water..."
Mark
04/08/2008 15:38
LMAO @ Whale, you fuck
Mark
04/08/2008 15:38
some SERIOUS prop shame bets come football season, if you find a QB that is, and its not breaking the truce to tell the truth btw LOL
joe
04/08/2008 15:41
whale...you da man...thanx for giving me my beer wish :)
Whale
04/08/2008 15:42
we'll find someone, we always do, until they go to the NFL and win Super Bowls that is...
whoops sorry Matty, i mean like the NFL championship game not the other kind ...
whoops sorry Matty, i mean like the NFL championship game not the other kind ...
Matty
04/08/2008 15:43
LOL Nice LOL
Whale
04/08/2008 15:44
Im thinking a pic of Mark kneeling across the border kissing Michigan soil hehehehe
#1 Killer
04/08/2008 15:44
HAHA @ Whale
Whale
04/08/2008 15:46
ill come up w/ something good by then...
Matty
04/08/2008 15:49
Side note Mark: from the other post, Atleast a hockey champ. is a good start to the season. How did your boys do in the NIT???
Mark
04/08/2008 15:52
We actually beat every team in the NIT quite convincingly Matty, we're gonna have to spend another couple mil on the Woody Hayes Athletic Center to expand the trophy case
Mark
04/08/2008 15:52
seeing as how there are about 4 crystal football coming our way
Matty
04/08/2008 15:53
sorry about that, Mark! they won? I dont watch much Nick at Nite.
Mark
04/08/2008 15:56
LOL @ Nick at Nite
Michigan basketball hasnt made the dance since Webber left in teh 80's LOL so go cut yourself in the dark EFF............LOL
Michigan basketball hasnt made the dance since Webber left in teh 80's LOL so go cut yourself in the dark EFF............LOL
Matty
04/08/2008 15:59
True!!! Sad to say the Fab 5 days weren't all the Fab. My best man pointed out the other while smokin' that Duke(my all time fuckfeet team, besides notreshame) went undefeated against them that whole time.
Whale
04/08/2008 16:18
well id rather be any team than the "Buff. Bills of college football"
Matty
04/08/2008 16:29
Hahaha!!!
Mark
04/08/2008 16:32
Hate Hate Hate Hate Hate Hate Hate Hate
Mark
04/08/2008 16:42
and at least we get there while your sitting home in January every year
Matty
04/08/2008 16:45
Tressel's V-neck sweaters are made out of 100% Rat Ass!!!
Mark
04/08/2008 16:51
Lloyd Carr got ran outta town cuz he wasnt good enough to match wits with The Vest
Matty
04/08/2008 16:55
Lord Carr..........fuck him, that era is OVER!!!
I'm leaving early to go get drunk!!
peace crotchgoblins!!
I'm leaving early to go get drunk!!
peace crotchgoblins!!
Chris
04/08/2008 17:05
why can't I stop watching Whale's avi...
Whale
04/08/2008 18:10
*achoo*
Mexico Joe
04/08/2008 18:54
we will finally understand women, turns out they just want to eat a lot without getting fat
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