06.26.08 From the Viking
Comedy List: Things a Drunken Pilot Says Over the Intercom
Written by DV Staff
A recent report released by India has indicated that around fifty pilots every year are grounded before their flights for failing to not be drunk. I can't judge you, Indian pilots – after all, American pilots have had their share of troubles with the booze. Hell, I'm not even a pilot and I'm drunk right now. But you have to believe some of these guys sneak through the screeners and fly. What do you think they tell their passengers?
- Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. If you look out your left window, you will see the house where my cheating whore of an ex-wife now lives.
- We'll be experiencing some turbulence, because I've never done a barrel roll before. Buckle up!
- Seriously, you guys are the best passengers. I love you so much.
- This is your captain speaking. Hahaaaaaaaaaa.
- Here's a little trick I learned during my time in Saudi Arabia. Jus' kiddin'!
YOUR TURN!
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Melissa
06/26/2008 16:06
"Did you know I'm in the cock-pit?? HA HAHAHAHAHAHA I said COCK....Waitress bring me another drink!"
mrjomorisin
06/26/2008 16:07
Does anyone in Coach know where this flight is supposed to end up?
joe
06/26/2008 16:11
hic.....yeah i know what i'm doing, i've got 400 hours of flying in on GTA4
mrjomorisin
06/26/2008 16:14
...you guys are all my best friends in the whole wide world, but you guys never call me or we don't go out or..what was your name again?
mrjomorisin
06/26/2008 16:16
On Matty Airlines--"ANYBODY BACK THERE GOT ANY PAPERS?"
Adam
06/26/2008 16:33
Airforce One requesting a fly-by of YOUR MOM!!! hhhhhaaaaaaahhhhaaahahaha
Steve
06/26/2008 16:34
"Oops."
Steve
06/26/2008 16:36
Hey what's this button do?
Matty
06/26/2008 16:42
"why the fuck does this plane say Greyhound on the side"
mrjomorisin
06/26/2008 16:47
We never got around to the actual "landing part" in flight school
Matty
06/26/2008 17:24
Hi my name is JFK Jr., I'll be your pilot this afternoon.
The Hitman
06/26/2008 17:27
shyahhh...sho, which one of dees buttons makesh the plane go up?
Oscar
06/26/2008 19:39
"This is your captain shhhpeaking. Does anyone know how to make a Kamikaze?"
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