04.16.08 From the Viking
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Comedy List: Signs for the NASA Offices
Written by DV Staff
A space probe crashing into the surface of Mars because somebody forgot a unit conversion. An astronaut driving across the country wearing a diaper to stalk another astronaut's girlfriend. And now, a thirteen year old German schoolboy has corrected the odds of an asteroid striking the Earth's surface, adjusting them from 1 in 45,000 to 1 in 450. Oops! What kinds of signs and posters decorate the NASA offices these days?
- Genius at work… in a classroom in Germany, not here.
- I hate Mondays! And attention to detail!
- The floggings will continue until the asteroid destroys us all.
- You want it WHEN? Can't do it, gotta change my diaper.
- Lack of planning on your part DOES NOT constitute an emergency on mine, except of course when your lack of planning involves an asteroid that will destroy us all.
YOUR TURN!
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MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:06
Fuck Martians
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:09
I'd rather be munging
Matty
04/16/2008 15:15
I'd rather be exploring URANUS!!
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:15
Mars or bust... or just busts, i dont give a shit
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:15
Caution: Epic Failures Ahead
Matty
04/16/2008 15:17
That's one small step for man....and one giant kick to the gunt for mankind!
Mark
04/16/2008 15:17
ET was a fake movie, and this unit is fake too
Mark
04/16/2008 15:18
LMFAO @ Gunt.......its my new favorite word
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:18
I Probe Black Holes
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:19
Gunt is a hilarious word!
Matty
04/16/2008 15:20
Feel free to throw it around at will!!!
I've been droppin' "GrundleWiskers" like it's nobody's bizz.
I've been droppin' "GrundleWiskers" like it's nobody's bizz.
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:20
I only hunt space poom
Matty
04/16/2008 15:22
MOONWALKING-will now only take place in little boys pants!!
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:25
ASStroids: a problem on earth too
joe
04/16/2008 15:29
naughty adolescent sex addicts
Matty
04/16/2008 15:30
N egotiating A liens S ucks A ss
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:31
Who's Ready for Chuck Yeager-Bombs?
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:31
Hey Matty, what happened to your wings the other night? Pens are looking to finish their series early tonight.
Matty
04/16/2008 15:31
Yea!! Mac, that's what I'm talking about!!
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:33
New "What Would You Do To"
http://forums.doubleviking.com/what-would-you-do-to-ride-on-the-ggw-bus-t180.html
http://forums.doubleviking.com/what-would-you-do-to-ride-on-the-ggw-bus-t180.html
Mark
04/16/2008 15:33
Your welcome for "Grundle-Whiskers"
Matty
04/16/2008 15:34
I was just about to say something about that, I was checking to see what time the games start!! Wings fucking CHOKED it big time. No worries, you guys have to drop one in the first round(NHL rule, advertising revenue? LOL)
I'm glad we lost the other night, that way we can close it out on Friday and I can get bent without work reprocussions.
I'm glad we lost the other night, that way we can close it out on Friday and I can get bent without work reprocussions.
Mark
04/16/2008 15:35
Matty, why are we so alike, but destined to hate one another due to sporting allegiances?
Mark
04/16/2008 15:35
Penguins FTW!
Jessica
04/16/2008 15:36
I have a vagina
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:37
"boys have a penis, girls have a vagina"
Mark
04/16/2008 15:37
That is debateable, im still convinced your a sex offender, roughly 40 yrs of age, lusting over young boys in your moms basement
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:37
Do your boys play tonight? If so, what time?
HAHA Yeah, that wouldn't surprise me with all the stupid TV rules they have... I have a huge paper due tomorrow and of course the Pens game is tonight...it's going to be a REALLY LONG NIGHT! And of course I have an exam @ 11 and a job interview @ 1:30 PM, so I can't really be a waste of flesh or it will cost me... Fuckin' life... LOL
HAHA Yeah, that wouldn't surprise me with all the stupid TV rules they have... I have a huge paper due tomorrow and of course the Pens game is tonight...it's going to be a REALLY LONG NIGHT! And of course I have an exam @ 11 and a job interview @ 1:30 PM, so I can't really be a waste of flesh or it will cost me... Fuckin' life... LOL
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:38
Penguins FTW indeed
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:38
@Jessica....*Random*
Mark
04/16/2008 15:39
~Unshaven sex offenders with 'milk' moustaches FTW~
Matty
04/16/2008 15:39
Mark, you are the sith and I am the jedi.
you are the water and I the vinager
you are the Bass ale and I, the Guiness lager
you get the point, although if we were to tear it up some night, I think we could shut a town down!!!
you are the water and I the vinager
you are the Bass ale and I, the Guiness lager
you get the point, although if we were to tear it up some night, I think we could shut a town down!!!
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:40
N/M, I just went to nhl.com ad checked it out. Perhaps I'll be able to catch some of your game after mine.
Mark
04/16/2008 15:40
NO DOUBT
Matty
04/16/2008 15:42
Killer, I think you are on Local tv @ 7 and we're on Versus at 9, wich is cool, cuz it's 6 my time and gives me a couple hours to hang out.
Good luck with everything tomorrow.......one of us needs to make it! LOL
Good luck with everything tomorrow.......one of us needs to make it! LOL
Matty
04/16/2008 15:43
This just in.....I think Jess might be an attention whore. Just sayin'
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:43
Sweet, glad I'll be able to catch them both for the most part...Now I just have to get this paper done (even though I'm at work...shhhh!)
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:44
Ummm....MAYBE! haha
Mark
04/16/2008 15:44
Oh man I cant believe I forgot to tell you guys this: I was headed back home from albany to my hometown where outside the city there is an abbundance of farm land. Anyhow, I was going to visit an old friend from HS who lives by said farmland, and I look out in the field where all the cows are grazing and there is a guy just running and frolicking the field amongst the cows and unconciously I go "Lukas, what the fuck are you doing in upstate man?!" HAHAHA. My gf is like "you dont know anyone named lukas do you?" IT WAS FUCKING LEGENDARY
Matty
04/16/2008 15:46
Hahahaha!!!
She apparently doesn't know about your secret life here?
She apparently doesn't know about your secret life here?
Mark
04/16/2008 15:46
No she does my friend, I gush about you in particular matty *sigh*
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:47
i think Lukas got a hold of a drink like Whale had, Rufee's and all
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:48
you guys are like Balki Bartokomous and Larry Appleton
joe
04/16/2008 15:48
i think jess is a really elaborate spambot about to inundate us ala apple
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:49
(only gay)
Matty
04/16/2008 15:52
Hetrosexual life partners.
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:52
I think she's a spambot who is powered by attention...
Mark
04/16/2008 15:54
LOL
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:54
Just ignore it and it will go away? haha
joe
04/16/2008 15:55
again, we quasi-agree on something killer.....wtf man i thought you were going to be my sworn enemy
Jessica
04/16/2008 15:55
Fine. I'm leaving. BYE
MacGyver
04/16/2008 15:56
"Stay perfectly still, Lois, their sight is based on movement.
Hooker: Where'd ya go?"
Hooker: Where'd ya go?"
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 15:57
Yeah, joe, don't worry...when judgment day comes, we'll hate each other enough for an epic battle. No question there.
Mark
04/16/2008 15:58
LOL @ Mac's perfectly timed Family Guy Reference
joe
04/16/2008 15:59
lol @ mac
@ jess..... " ......."
@ jess..... " ......."
Oscar
04/16/2008 16:00
Balki Bartokomous! Great reference. Sometimes the world looks perfect, nothing to rearrange. Sometimes you just get the feeling like you need some kind of change. STANDING TALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL...
MacGyver
04/16/2008 16:00
lol joe
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 16:00
*Crickets, crickets*
Matty
04/16/2008 16:02
Ocsar, I hope you had to google the lyrics for Perfect Strangers, other wise................
Oscar
04/16/2008 16:04
Yes sir. Then I stumble upon that colorful ass pic of Balki. Wasn't he a coke dealer in True Romance?
joe
04/16/2008 16:04
*whispers* is the scary lady gone yet guys????
Mark
04/16/2008 16:06
BALKI!!!!!!!!!!
Janel
04/16/2008 16:08
I just met Jessica in my shallow grave
Oscar
04/16/2008 16:09
wtf? Lol squared.
Mark
04/16/2008 16:09
LMFAO@ the janel imposter
Oscar
04/16/2008 16:10
@Mark "And now we do the Happy Dance!"
Janel
04/16/2008 16:10
not imposter, spirit
Oscar
04/16/2008 16:11
oops. Dance of Joy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfPg5LjGYz8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfPg5LjGYz8
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 16:11
LOL@ spirit
Janel
04/16/2008 16:11
the essence maybe even
Oscar
04/16/2008 16:12
I'ma go take a shit.
Janel
04/16/2008 16:12
any body wanna Mung?
Mark
04/16/2008 16:12
Hell no!
Mark
04/16/2008 16:13
bitch you've been dead since new years
Janel
04/16/2008 16:13
any necrophiliacs?
Janel
04/16/2008 16:13
so that means my mung will get u drunk
Janel
04/16/2008 16:14
i want some hot tits, gimme gimme
Matty
04/16/2008 16:18
Party time boy-o's, I'm setting up the Skeet Bong, and lines of MUNG!!
Janel
04/16/2008 16:18
oh no... Vego the Carpathian, g2g
Matty
04/16/2008 16:18
Sorry Oscar, Yes, Balki was the coke dealer.
MacGyver
04/16/2008 16:19
LOL
Matty
04/16/2008 16:19
I dated a girl whose nickname was Balki, due to her last name, I thought because she sounded like a retarded foreiner.
Lukas
04/16/2008 16:22
haha u look away from the site for an hr and it produces this
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 16:26
Yeah, that's def. how it happens...There are some sick fucks on here... HAHA
joe
04/16/2008 16:28
is it not your job to not look away from dv lukas?
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 16:31
Yeah, he was skipping out on work...fortunately, the rest of us don't do that!
Oscar
04/16/2008 16:31
Lukas, I want more DVTV! How about another round of The Night Shift?
MacGyver
04/16/2008 16:38
yeah Lukas, u missed the spirit of Janel
Matty
04/16/2008 16:39
Lukas, I want more DVDA!!
Lukas
04/16/2008 16:40
oscar, more dvtv is on the way
Lukas
04/16/2008 16:41
i was working on shit that didn't involve reading comments, u doucher mcgenerals
Jessica
04/16/2008 16:42
Can I come back yet or no?
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 16:43
I want more DVD, eh.
joe
04/16/2008 16:43
@ jess "........."
lol
lol
MacGyver
04/16/2008 16:44
Double vag double anal ftw
#1 Killer
04/16/2008 16:44
*crickets, crickets* HAHA
Lukas
04/16/2008 16:44
haha jess, how big is your dick again?
Janel
04/16/2008 16:45
bitch please
Janel
04/16/2008 16:46
Sgt. Lt. Cmd. SnootyMcFartPants says hi
Jessica
04/16/2008 16:46
I don't have one. My dildo is a decent size, though.
So you live in Milwaukee, eh? I'm movin to a place on Oakland next month :) You can come to the first party if you're cute.
So you live in Milwaukee, eh? I'm movin to a place on Oakland next month :) You can come to the first party if you're cute.
Janel
04/16/2008 16:49
i live in a shallow grave if u wanna come visit
Janel
04/16/2008 16:50
Lukas has seen my boobs
Matty
04/16/2008 16:50
"my love for you, like ticking clock, berzerker"
"would you like to making fuck, berzerker"
"would you like to making fuck, berzerker"
Janel
04/16/2008 16:51
what do u got
Lukas
04/16/2008 18:18
i don't live in milwaukee. fail
Jessica
04/16/2008 18:41
Thats what Whale said :( HE LIES.
Whale
04/16/2008 19:32
No, i said hes from there... not that he lives there now...
Whale
04/16/2008 19:32
Whale
04/16/2008 19:33
dont be puttin' words in my mouth
Jessica
04/16/2008 19:58
ill put somethin else in your mouth ;)
Erik
04/16/2008 20:24
Are you going to be near Oakland Gyros?
Jessica
04/16/2008 20:28
nahhh a couple blocks away, man. why? you from around there?
Matty
04/16/2008 20:40
No, Erik is the guy that asks "you want cucumber sauce and feta on that?"
MacGyver
04/16/2008 21:09
...in the butt, on myspace, in the butt, in the butt...
The Hitman
04/16/2008 21:15
lmao...you guys are insane. and janel's mung probably tastes like a fermented mix of feces, beer, and cottage cheese. just the way mac likes it...
i kid, buddy, i kid...
i kid, buddy, i kid...
MacGyver
04/16/2008 21:18
no need kid about mung Chris, lol
Matty
04/16/2008 21:19
Hitman, I want THAT topping on my gyro(jiro, earyo,however it's properly said)
In the butt!!!!!!!
In the butt!!!!!!!
Matty
04/16/2008 21:20
Mac, don't you ever kid about MUNG.....unless it's an actual kid's mung!??
Matty
04/16/2008 21:22
Sorry, had to take a break during intermission(hockey,spliff).
Just wanted to see who's still lurking about?
Just wanted to see who's still lurking about?
MacGyver
04/16/2008 21:25
im here in a computer lab doing a damn report watching the game via live.nhl.com
MacGyver
04/16/2008 21:26
go pens 2 to 1
Matty
04/16/2008 21:27
Fork in your eye!!! That goes for Killer, where ever he's munging!
Matty
04/16/2008 21:28
by the way Mac, I like the way you use "college resources" just like I did(do)
MacGyver
04/16/2008 21:29
eh, at school and work, i do what i can
MacGyver
04/16/2008 21:30
and i would bet killers probably drunk watching the game
The Hitman
04/16/2008 21:43
i'd say that's guaranteed
MacGyver
04/16/2008 21:46
Well the Pens swept the Sens, we rock
Matty
04/16/2008 22:03
Much love Mac.......this is the hops and barley speaking.....FUCK!!!!!!!!!!
Matty
04/16/2008 22:05
+ I told Killer, if the Wings lose(i've already shat on Mich. teams thus far) that my dollar bills are on the Pens!!!
Matty
04/16/2008 22:07
Welp, game time for me!!! I'll either be talking shit in a few hours or I'll be hearing about it tommorow morning...........YOU EFF'S
Jessica
04/16/2008 22:08
i want BBQ chicken wings :(
Matty
04/16/2008 22:11
I want "thighs and legs" BBQ is optional
The Hitman
04/16/2008 22:24
I want a thigh in each hand and a breast in my mouth.
Whale
04/16/2008 22:54
Ill have what hes having^^
Matty
04/16/2008 22:59
HOLLA, at my dirty brother's
MacGyver
04/16/2008 23:28
i'll take a vagina
joe
04/16/2008 23:36
fuckin matty really took to the lines of skeet, i guess it s gonna be around for a while. ill try to find the dvd and make a clip, that bitch has TALENT i think it was called "Navy Girls Love Semen" thats fucking classy right there gents!
joe
04/16/2008 23:37
oh great, it was quiet and alluva sudden i uttered "lines of mung" imagine the drip!
MacGyver
04/16/2008 23:38
i dont know what ur trying to say there joe, but im sure its important
joe
04/16/2008 23:48
i had posted on the porn article about this one chick i saw snorting cum aka "lines of skeet" which i noticed matty has been referencing a lot. just wanted to share the awesomeness
Matty
04/16/2008 23:49
Hey Mac..................Wings just lost!!!
I'll be snorting mung all night!
Thanks Joe!
I'll be snorting mung all night!
Thanks Joe!
MacGyver
04/16/2008 23:49
Janel mung
MacGyver
04/16/2008 23:49
Joe, got it
Matty
04/16/2008 23:50
again Joe, my word of the day was "Gunt"
a chicks belly roll mixed with the cunt area, leading to the "Gunt"
a chicks belly roll mixed with the cunt area, leading to the "Gunt"
Matty
04/16/2008 23:52
"lines of skeet" seriously...one of the best TAG lines to get a bimbo(jessica) over to your pad
joe
04/17/2008 00:10
gunt is the new FUPA fatty upper pubic area
Matty
04/17/2008 00:37
Still, I owe you for "lines of skeet"
funniest shit i've hear and mentally pictured of all week!! Lovin' it!!
funniest shit i've hear and mentally pictured of all week!! Lovin' it!!
Matty
04/17/2008 00:38
Jessica
04/17/2008 00:39
Ummm how am I a bimbo? Jerk butt.
I have a FUPA :(
I have a FUPA :(
Matty
04/17/2008 00:45
I just randomly insert (names of females that "used to hang with us") and now you happend to be the newwwwwwest!
Jessica
04/17/2008 00:46
Ok I forgive you
Matty
04/17/2008 00:47
Lukas, please point Jess in the general direction of "Jan..she who shalt not be named" direction.
Jessica
04/17/2008 00:48
I'm gonna punch you in the taint
Matty
04/17/2008 00:50
Well, you have joined the club of Getting a fucking spork,spoon/fork shoved in your GUNT!!!!!!
Jessica
04/17/2008 01:01
but my FUPA and gut dont really connect at all...
MacGyver
04/17/2008 01:19
definition of GUNT:
http://www.onlinebee.net/bbs/data/onlinebee_net/cameltoe.jpg
FTW!!!
http://www.onlinebee.net/bbs/data/onlinebee_net/cameltoe.jpg
FTW!!!
Matty
04/17/2008 01:33
HAAAAAAA! Nighty Nite, don't forget to keep your butthole tight!!
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