03.28.08 From the Viking
Comedy List: Euphemisms for Abortion
Written by DV Staff
Uh oh! Let's say you had an abortion, but you want to tell your friends and family in somewhat more delicate terms. How're you gonna do it?
- I called Roto-Rooter.
- I solved a problem.
- A genie granted me a wish.
- I took a trip to the life un-ruiner.
- I hopped in a time machine and set the date to No Baby.
YOUR TURN!
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Oscar
03/28/2008 15:24
I unscrewed the lightbulb
#1 Killer
03/28/2008 15:28
Murder...Too ethical?
jibson
03/28/2008 15:29
also not a euphemism killer
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:30
She scrambled an egg.
#1 Killer
03/28/2008 15:31
Oh well, worth a shot.
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:32
She cleaned out the ol' uterus.
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:33
She had a voluntary miscarriage
jibson
03/28/2008 15:34
your avy's worth a 'shot' killer.
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:34
She unDaddyed me.
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:35
I imagine killer's avy is getting it up her arse by me.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:35
the can of worms has been opened
jibson
03/28/2008 15:35
enema in the front bottom.
joe
03/28/2008 15:35
i sat on a coat hanger
joe
03/28/2008 15:36
i made myself queef cherry cobbler
jibson
03/28/2008 15:36
resumed normal operations
joe
03/28/2008 15:36
now that i think about that, mebbe that was a little rough on the imagery, srry all
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:36
to knock up in reverse order
joe
03/28/2008 15:37
i removed a parasite
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:37
i just saved on baby sitting
Whale
03/28/2008 15:37
Tossed the biscut out of the oven.
joe
03/28/2008 15:37
went on a hardcore crash diet, lost 10 lbs in 2 minutes
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:37
She freed up space.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:38
intensional premature evacuation
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:38
she cleaned out her garage.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:38
she saved herself the trouble of getting punched in the stomach
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:39
She kebobbed last night.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:39
shes going back on the rag a little sooner than expected
Whale
03/28/2008 15:39
Rebattered the baby (? or is that too far)
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:40
just fed the worms
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:40
She just made Christopher Reeves stronger
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:41
Just popped her massive belly wart
Whale
03/28/2008 15:42
She just made a sacrifice to the baby god(s)?
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:42
We just found out her doctor's a murderer...of our child! "hahaha" "no, but seriously, she did the ol' abortion. So who wants more shrimp?"
Whale
03/28/2008 15:42
im not so good at these
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:43
"She just made Christopher Reeves stronger"
-Mac
FUckin hilarious, I know what you mean!
-Mac
FUckin hilarious, I know what you mean!
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:43
What is red and is creeping up your leg?
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:43
An abortion with homesickness.
#1 Killer
03/28/2008 15:43
She theoretically fell down the stairs
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:44
Oscar, i hoped someone did, haha
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:44
What do you call two abortions in a bucket?
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:44
Blood brothers.
Whale
03/28/2008 15:45
She got busy with the vacuum cleaner
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:47
she loved her unborn baby to death, literally
Whale
03/28/2008 15:47
We got that new thing, it's called the Anti-Baby!
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:47
How do you make a dead baby float?
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:47
Take your foot off of it's head.
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:48
What do you call an abortion in Prague? A cancelled cheque ( Czech! )
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:49
LOL Czech
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:49
She just sent her baby down the water slide with the Cosby kids
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:51
Theo muthafuckin Huxtable ftw
joe
03/28/2008 15:52
hey mom, dad, i have some news o gotta tell ya's, i'll come over tonight, don't worry, i'll bring dinner.....what, oh i figured i'd bring some sorta cassarole, yeah like tuna surprise or something, okay see ya at 8.
joe
03/28/2008 15:53
we're not going dead babies again are we?
seriously we are all well aware we'll be here well past 5 oclock with that
seriously we are all well aware we'll be here well past 5 oclock with that
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:54
I would have socked Busta Rhymes in his fucking face. "ding dinga ding ding"
Oscar
03/28/2008 15:55
She threw away my Baby Back Ribs.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 15:56
http://www.doubleviking.com/caption-this-picture-3-05-08-8302-p.html
Kristus
03/28/2008 15:57
"Aborted" the "fetus."
Oscar
03/28/2008 16:00
Kristus in the house!!!!!
Oscar
03/28/2008 16:00
She threw away her chinese bookstops
Oscar
03/28/2008 16:01
She Shat Sammy
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:02
A woman and her fetus were walking into a clinic. "I'm scared," said the fetus.
The woman replies: "How do you think I feel? I have to walk out of here alone!"
The woman replies: "How do you think I feel? I have to walk out of here alone!"
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:02
Why did the fetus cross the road?
Because they moved the dumpster.
Because they moved the dumpster.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:02
Did you hear about the fetus that started a bar fight?
He went there to "stir-up" some trouble!
He went there to "stir-up" some trouble!
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:03
A fetus approaches a single girl at a party."Hey sexy, would you like a drink?" he asks.
She looks down and says, "Do I have a choice?"
"Well...yes you do," says the fetus.
She looks down and says, "Do I have a choice?"
"Well...yes you do," says the fetus.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:03
Why is a fetus like a condom?
It's safer with one, but more fun without.
It's safer with one, but more fun without.
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:04
knock-knock
who's there?
you'll never know!
who's there?
you'll never know!
Oscar
03/28/2008 16:04
There's an actual IMDB thread on
"Why didn't the Winslows lock their front door?" from Family Matters
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096579/board/nest/100574629
God these fuckers must be like 12
"Why didn't the Winslows lock their front door?" from Family Matters
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096579/board/nest/100574629
God these fuckers must be like 12
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:06
http://www.broadcaster.com/clip/12006
joe
03/28/2008 16:08
wtf? that was random oscar, and mac you realize by linking that if we all went there at the same time we'd kill dv again
MacGyver
03/28/2008 16:09
whoops
InglewoodJack
03/28/2008 16:21
Birth Control
Oscar
03/28/2008 16:24
Prom Night Dumpster Baby!
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