Accidental Deaths You Definitely Shouldn't Laugh At

Death By Taco Bell

No, she didn't die from eating one too many Chalupas, although that is a constant concern for the catering staff that works at The View. A woman in Nebraska was outside of a Taco Bell—and little did she know it was going to be her last quesadilla. The sign that supported the Taco Bell sign snapped due to strong winds and faulty welding (those signs are a hell of a lot bigger and heavier than they look from the drive through). She was, sadly, crushed.

Death by Delicious Chocolate

Other than a sudden heart attack in the middle of an orgy with twin sister lesbians from Estonia, dying in a vat of Hershey's chocolate is probably the second best way to die. Well, not really, as one employee in New Jersey found out when he fell into a melting tank of chocolate. Yes, a “melting tank,” which means that the chocolate was incredibly hot—about 120 degrees. While that isn't enough to kill you alone, he was unfortunately knocked out by one of the automated stirring paddles and drowned in hot, gooey chocolate. Hershey bar, anyone?

Death By Novelty Sized Cake

An Italian stripper was hired to jump out of a cake for a lucky birthday boy. The partyers sang happy birthday to their guest of honor, and were disappointed when the hot, young stripper didn't pop out of the cake, shaking her money maker. Irritated and thinking that the hussy must have left or gone out back for a smoke, they looked inside the cake and found a horrifying surprise: the body of the stripper. She had suffocated and died inside the cake. Now that's a birthday present nobody could ever forget: “Hey Todd, we got you a dead stripper! Happy birthday bro!” Everyone knows that the only place a dead stripper should be is in the trunk of your car, not a cake.