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New Toy Line Gives Away 'Spider-Man: Homecoming' Spoilers

It’s funny how often movie spoilers come from toy companies, rather than filmmakers themselves.

We probably have George Lucas to thank for that. Ever since Star Wars proved that merchandise is where the real money in movies can be found, companies have been eager to promote their range of action figures above and beyond the actual motion pictures themselves.

This means that if a character has several costumes over the course of a movie, each one needs its own action figure (all the better to increase toy sales).

It also means that a casual glance at a toy range will tell you most of the beats for a movie that the studio itself is keeping as close to the vest as possible.

In the case of this ugly new Spider-Man: Homecoming action figure, this rush to shake kids down for their pocket money has revealed that good old Peter Parker will be ditching his swish Stark-tech Spidey suit in favor of a more homespun appearance.

It’s hard to imagine the sad, pathetic kid who, when faced with a wall of action figures in their local Toys ‘R’ Us, decides to go for the crummy Spider-Man toy instead of one which features a decent costume.

This future scenario is all the more tragic when you imagine how quickly these particular figures will end up in bargain bins. The line between the Haves and Have Nots on the school playground will be decided by whether your parents are rich enough to buy you a decent Spider-Man toy, or whether you’re having to get by with the $2 budget option that looks like an generic knockoff.

That said, we don’t really learn anything that we hadn’t already seen before. As long as you’ve been paying attention to the trailers for Homecoming, you’ll probably already know that Peter Parker will at one point wear his dumb homemade costume again.

Back when we got an original teaser for the first Spider-Man: Homecoming trailer (because even trailers have teasers these days) we saw Peter in his original costume.

Presumably at some point in the movie, annoyed at Peter’s consistent attempts to prove himself as a hero (possibly after saving a boat-load of fellow students), Tony Stark confiscates the decent Spidey suit, and Peter goes back to his homemade costume.

Then, just in time for the exciting finale, Stark has a change of heart.

It’s amazing the amount that you can read between the lines based solely on the photo of an action figure.

In giving us this insight into the upcoming movie, this toy has probably provided more enjoyment than any kid will manage to get from it, as they wistfully ponder what life would be like if they could afford a real Spider-Man toy.

Matthew loffhagen

Matthew Loffhagen

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