“Okay,” says Kevin Feige, glancing around the conference room with a weary look in his eyes, “who hasn’t been in one of our movies yet?”
The various executives and filmmakers that constitute Marvel’s shadowy Illuminati all scratch their head and shuffle their feet. This question is getting harder and harder to answer.
Kurt Russell? No, he’s in Guardians of the Galaxy 2.
Sigourney Weaver? She’s been signed on for The Defenders.
Jeff Bridges? Oh, yeah—he was the villain in the first MCU movie.
Will Smith? He’s signed on with the enemy.
Peter Cushing? Lucasfilm won’t let us borrow his face.
Sean Connery is retired.
Anna Kendrick has been inexplicably banned from superhero movies.
Meryl Streep isn’t returning any calls after receiving death threats from Trump supporters.
Haley Joel Osment looks kind of creepy now.
Basically, every actor in Hollywood has either already had a starring role in a comic book movie, or is, for some reason or other, an imperfect choice for the MCU.
There’s nobody left.
“Fine,” Kevin Feige takes a long drag of a cigarette, before flicking it into the bosoms of a Black Widow ashtray, “who can we steal from Fox?”
And that is the story of how Peter Dinklage has wound up being offered a role in Infinity War and Avengers 4.
There’s a joke about House Stark and Tony Stark here, but it’s up to you to assemble it yourself, like some kind of Ikea flat pack pop culture reference.
Of course, there’s very few downsides to having the wonderful Peter Dinklage in the MCU. It’s a bit strange that he’s going to be appearing in a couple of Avengers movies that already contain almost every single character Marvel has ever brought to the big screen.
With the Avengers prime (and the various squishy human sidekicks) all vying for screen time, the Guardians of the Galaxy wanting their own moments to shine, and outsiders like Spider-Man, Doctor Strange, and Captain Marvel all trying to fit in somewhere, it’s unusual that Marvel is planning to jam yet another character into the mix.
Oh well. At the end of the day, it’s all about toy sales, and who could resist a Peter Dinklage superhero figure?
The natural assumption is that Dinklage will play a role like the one filled by Martin Freeman in Captain America: Civil War, which is to say, it’ll be a tiny part that’s not really worthy of an actor of his notoriety, but that promises bigger things in additional, less crowded movies a little further down the line.
There are always other options, though.
Peter Dinklage would make a great She-Hulk, if given a bucket of green paint and ample opportunity to put his acting chops to the test.